The Prentice-Roth family gathered around Bob in his hospital room on November 25, 2023. The day will always be remembered as the last time we were all together before Bob left us to live in Heaven with Jesus.
After two go-arounds with melanoma–one in 2022 and a second episode discovered in June of 2023–we knew Bob's gig here on Earth was coming to a close. As much as we wanted to remain optimistic and believe that Bob would beat this cancer, after five months of treatments, we knew that the healing we had prayed for wasn't going to come this side of heaven.
By this time last year, he had made it clear to us all that he was ready to meet Jesus, and he was done with treatments and didn't want any measures taken to prolong his life. His doctor said she would see to it that he was kept as comfortable as possible. Bob had been in the hospital since I took him to the ER late on Thanksgiving. I visited with him a couple of times on Friday, and he seemed to be at peace with what he knew was to come.
That night, I went home to my empty and strangely quiet house and somehow managed to get some sleep. On Saturday morning, I headed back to the hospital, where the nurse greeted me with the news that Bob was awake and alert and wouldn't need any pain meds for a while, so my timing was perfect for a visit. Bob and I were enjoying a good visit when I decided to call Tasha to see if the family could come to the hospital right away. I explained that her dad was in a really good mood and this was their opportunity to visit with him before he had to take something to control the pain.
Within a half hour, the whole family–minus our son, Josh, who was in a nursing home in Huron (that's a whole other story for another time), along with Nick's folks and our very good friends, Clark and Theresa, were encircled Bob in the large hospital room. The scene that unfolded was so beautiful–truly a gift from God–and one we will always treasure.
One by one, the grandchildren approached their grandpa and hugged him while expressing their love for him and receiving Grandpa's words of blessing over them. Amidst tears and laughter, each one in the room, including Tasha, Clark, and Theresa, spent time loving on Bob and he on them.
At one point, Clark suggested singing the hymn Blessed Assurance! Jesus is mine! Oh, what a foretaste of glory divine! Clark prayed over Bob and for our whole family, and then Bob asked if we would sing Amazing Grace, My Chains Are Gone! It was so good to see Bob enjoying the family, but after a while, it became apparent that he was getting tired and was ready for some pain meds. So once again, each person in the room took their turn with Bob, and there were more tears, laughter, words of encouragement, lots of hugs, and saying their goodbyes.
I stayed with Bob for a few hours, spending most of the time writing and praying while he slept. Before leaving him on Saturday evening, I kissed him and told him I loved him. His response was, "You're my favorite wife. I love you." If I had a dollar for every time he said that to me (or I said to him, "You're my favorite husband"), I'd have one very large pile of one-dollar bills! LOL!
I am glad I took some pictures and recorded some videos that I took that day. I will share a few of my favorite pics with you.
Today, one year later, I am rejoicing in God's amazing grace that brought us together one last time before Bob passed quietly in his sleep in the early hours of Monday morning, November 27.
Saturday wasn't the last time I saw Bob, though. After church on Sunday, I came and sat with him for several hours. Again, he slept much of the time while I continued to write. I felt impressed to write out what I wanted to say to Bob before he left, and I was so glad that I was able to share with him what I had written on Sunday night before I headed home. (I also shared it at his celebration of life a couple of weeks later.)
Bob, my dearest Bob…
I love you.
Three simple words that say and mean so much.
Words we have said to each other every day—many times a day—for over 45 years.
Words that speak of commitment, tenderness, joy, goodness, kindness, patience, understanding, playfulness, intimacy, and perseverance, sadness, struggles, pain, good old-fashioned hard work, and even heartbreak.
I. Love. You.
There is the “I love you” of a new relationship—really just a glimpse of what love is meant to be. Like a bud on a branch, there is the promise of full bloom.
There is the “I love you “ of a growing love, a bud opening until it is wide, bright, and with its own unique beauty.
There is the “I love you” of sustaining love, bending and swaying to life’s breezes, all the while fragrantly sweetening life together.
There is the “I love you “ of enduring love, battered and scarred by life’s most difficult struggles and storms, yet hanging on. Tenaciously holding on to the branch and to each other.
There is the “I love you” of undying love that reaches into eternity. As you take that next step, the beautiful fragrant flower is torn in two, and I am left with the memory of what once was. And you, my dear, are forever in the presence of our Creator. One day, I will join you there, my love, where time ends and eternity begins.
Today, we are on the brink of eternity, and I love you more than I ever dreamed possible. New love. Growing love. Sustaining love. Enduring love. Undying love. Love in full bloom.
I wish I could say that I have loved you perfectly, that I have always loved you exactly as you are. How much time did I waste trying to change you into my idea of the ideal husband? How many times did I fail to affirm you the way you needed me to affirm you because you weren’t living up to my expectations? How many times did you need my encouragement but were crushed by my criticism? Forgive me, Bob, for failing to love you perfectly. Thank you for loving me through all those times. I am so thankful for God’s amazing grace. It is always enough.
And, Bob, I forgive you, too, for the times when, in your humanness, your love for me wasn’t perfect. I know that you have always loved me the best way you knew how. And for that, I am so gratefully blessed.
Thank you for always being my friend. For being such an encourager—my biggest fan—my cheerleader. For helping me to see myself through eyes of hope and possibility when all I could see was my failure. For laughing through life with me. For dreaming big dreams with me. For living and loving me when I wasn’t very lovely. For being the one I could live with and share my life with all these 45 years. –VLP November 26, 2023
I am so glad God, in his amazing grace, saw fit to prompt me to write and gave me the opportunity to read what I wrote to Bob Sunday before I left him. I remember he told me that he loved what I wrote and that he wanted me to print it out and hang it on his wall so he could see it. Not long after that, we said our goodbyes for the last time. We each said, "I love you," and then he said, "Drive careful." Even in his last hours, my dear, sweet husband was thinking of my safety and well-being.
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